La lana

Some local establishments are big on superstitions. I can respect that. I especially love the borreguito next to the cash register. Kaching! Vamos a ganar mucha lana.

Winter "Blizzard" Hours

More fun from Naturall Yogurt over on the southside: Winter Hours

It seems that the good people over at Naturall Yogurt are expecting heaving blizzards this winter for they have altered their hours of operation in anticipation of the heavy snowfalls. No sense in getting caught in two feet of snow just 'cuz you had a frito pie craving. I'm glad they're keeping it real.

Carne Asada

Fellow blogger, Que Fregados, featured a crazy youtube video of some guy going off on 'carne asada'. I thought it was a bit funny and decided to give the video some more play on this site. Watch it or go to Fregados blog and view the others by the same uploader. Let's make it go Laredo viral!

Check out the Laredo Parks and Rec shirt on this guy. At least he has guts. 

"Una carnita, aqui ya sabes para los youtube members, you now for keeping it totally mexican-american, latino, hispanic, border living, laredo, TX!"

No Freebies

 

Saw this sign at a local restaurant, Naturall Yogurt, on the southside Loop. I don't have anything to say about it. It is what it is.

Random Movie Quote of the week

From a movie, but my personal creed that I live by:

"Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pu*sy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days." 

  Give the title of the movie and you win my admiration.

Poeta

POETA plates, click to enlarge

I had never met a real Poeta before. But, I was at a stoplight recently, and fate brought me up close and personal to a real Poeta! I was thrilled. I was flabbergasted. I wanted to write a haiku about it. I tried to pull up next to this poet, but he sped away and left me breathing his smog. Alas, no poets for me.

Quiero Volverte a Ver

 The Holidays are not my favorite time of the year. Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years are just a downer for me. I'm actually glad to have them out of the way and I can go back to living it up, like its 1999.

I didn't used to be this way though. Christmas and New Year's Day used to be the raddest time of the year, now its just another expense. It's not that I want to be all Ebenezer-like, but that's just the way it goes these days.

I spent a night over at my Mother's house recently,  for reasons that you should not be concerned with, and I went to sleep in my old bedroom circa-1996. I was awaken early Sunday morning by the loud music that was still being played by one of my parents' neighbors. It turns out that their party had gone on well into the wee hours of the morning, so much so, that by 7am, they were barely finishing up their last can of Schlitz and jamming out to Fama.



I was used to those particular neighbors, for many a nights, back in the day, they had done just that. They would stay up drinking all night and listening to Tejano records.  They listened to Fama so much, they actually made me kinda like the band. And so it was again a couple of days ago. Me, trying to get some sleep in my old bedroom, but the next door neighbors playing Fama at 7am, still drinking the night (morning) away. I was awaken to the song of  "Quiero volverte a ver", and for s split second, I actually thought it was 1996 again, and I was a junior in high school and sleeping of a bad Plaza Disco hangover.

Unfortunetly, its 2011, and I was not hungover, just plain tired. Too bad. In any case, I leave you with this blog link (Tigre Texano), just in case you want to download some of that Fama stuff.

A Poem about a toe

Three Fourths Please

By

J.A. Jimenez

I awoke, big toe still lingering on my foot.

The drones [in green] cut across

the dotted line. A smiley face

drawn on my leg served as a guide

so they wouldn’t miss. The buzzing of a saw

announced their task. Two orbs

of light above me warmed my ass.

I heard the drip, drip, drip,

of the morphine by my side,

and I remembered high school and the good

times I had getting high. But just like back then

 the fun ended all too soon.

A high five signaled their success

and when I looked down

there was my toe
smiling at me
from inside
a medicine cup.

Puro P*nche Cowboys

This town is crazy for their Dallas Cowboys. Even though they had a less than stellar season, some fans still love to show their  love for their favorite team on everything imaginable, including vehicle decals.

Click to enlarge

I spotted this vehicle as I made my daily rounds around town. "Puro P*nche Cowyboys", the decal reads. That about sums up sports in Laredo. Maybe next year.

The Hand goes to Wal Mart

I'm not sure what was wrong with me. It was a momentary lapse of reason. I had to do some quick X-Mas shopping, so for some bizarre reason I ventured to the WalMart (by Chillis on I-35) and man was the place a mad house. I stepped in and quickly wanted out, but I was sucked in by the evil WalMart trappings. It was a bad afternoon for the hand. Live and learn.

I've been naughty lately..

Santa after X-Mas, goes on bender

  I've been very naughty lately. Yup, bad to the bone(r). One of my biggest sins has been neglecting this blog the last week or so. There has been other things that has put my name on Santa's coal list, but you need not concern your perfect life with those trivial tidbits.

I've been busy flipping off the bird to crazy paisanos and those cocky Monterrey shoppers that turn Best Buy, Walmart and Academy stores into a complete zoo. But enough about them, I do apologize for not having posted anything in over a week. I promise it won't happen again (crossed fingers behind back).

Santa, don't disappoint me please, like back in X-Mas 1987 when I wanted that He-Man and Battlecat action figure, but you goofed the order and sent me Rainbow Brite instead. That was so not cool. Then, Santa, you tried blaming 'the elves were knocking back too much eggnog', but that was just lame-o.

 
So, don't goof up this time Santa-Claws. You know what's on my Christmas list. I've been good enough this year too. Just ask around all over Laredo, in all the good neighborhoods: Cantaranas, La Ladrillera, El Chacon, Azteca, even in Santa Rita. I was good this year Santa, for the most part.