For reasons that are not too clear to me at the moment, I haven't stopped by this blog and shared my thoughts with my public lately. There are few things worse in life than letting down all 11 of my loyal readers.
Maybe I was too busy running for office. Maybe I just could not be dragged away from those spinning maquinitas that line every corner of this creepy city. Or maybe I was just too sick from all the carne-asada ingesting, Dallas Cowboys orgy-loving that seems to once again wrapped its kinky arms around this god-forsaken city.
Truth is I have been indulging myself in endless re-runs of shitty TV shows that have made it difficult to drag my fingers from off my remote control onto this aging laptop, with keyboards so sticky you'd think I ate toast with jam over it. Alas, the stickiness is not due to strawberry jam.
Which brings me to my point. One such show that seems to have hit a little too close for comfort is Californication. You might know the show or its premise. If you don't, its cool, I wont bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that, some of the gritty, over-the-top, disgusting moments from that show seem to bare some strange resemblance to the last three years of my life. But as that old disclaimer says, any resemblance to real people is clearly coincidental. I'm not saying I'm David Duchovny, in fact I've been told I look like Paul Rodriguez' ugly younger brother. The point is, I've been busy not blogging due to so discrepancies within my own twisted life.
However, there comes a time in a man's life, even a man like me, a poor schmuck from Santo Baby, TX to grow the hell up. There comes a time to look past the instant gratifications of the flesh, throw caution to the wind and immerse oneself in a good-old fashion, south-Laredo monogamous relationship that even Ricky Ricardo would approve.
Having been married several times already, I figured what the heck, why not again? Maybe because I've had so much practice at being married, I could actually do it right this time. That's what I figured. How many times can a man mess up? Isn't redemption always just around the corner? Having driven around all the the major points of this city throughout this Sunday afternoon, from Meadow to Saunders to Pita Mangana Road, I've come to the conclusion that it's definitely OK to accept my past, but its much more important to mold a better future for myself. Having said that and having invited a band of cliches to take a seat upon my couch, I decided mucho more than just that.
We all make minor changes within our lives, at one point or another. This blog has always been therapuetic for me and, heck, I can honestly say it has been instrumental in keeping me in touch with who I am and where I come from. And I'm ok with that. Even though I neglect the blog, I know I can always come back to its waiting arms, ever so desperate for my warm embrace. And I know what I am, now. I'm a 30-something year old man from south Laredo with big dreams, no money, zero talent but all the ambition in the world to correct the wrongs and make them right. And I'm OK with that. All it took was a quiet Sunday drive from Meadow to Pita Mangana Road to make understand the obvious.
I'm definitely OK with that.