Random Pinata guy (pt. 2)

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Nunca falta, guy on roof at pinata party

Sometimes it's necessary to risk life and limb for the simple pleasure of the pinata party.  After all, whats a birthday party in Laredo, without a pinata? Might as well not have one. However, someone has to inevitably climb the roof, and we hope its not the one person that's had one too many Schaeffer lights. Pete knows we've all seen that before.

 The one guy that has no business climbing the roof is the first one that has his guarache over the rail. I've seen too many accidents and near accidents to know that Pinata on roof guy has to be rewarded and respected. Just as long as I ain't the one climbing the roof to hold the rope. I ain't putting down my Shaeffer for that!

Meet the Rangers (part 1)

The first installment of, "Meet the Rangers"

Texas Ranger's third baseman, Michael Young, is the longest tenured player on the team. His steady bat, quick glove and like-able persona make him the face of the franchise.

Michael is the Rangers' version of Tony Romo. He is of half-Mexican descent, always smiling, puts up great numbers but has yet to win anything that really counts.

He is the all-time Rangers leader in hits, and before the end of his career, he will lead the team in many offensive categories. Yet, Michael has never been to the playoffs, much less the World Series. Thought his career, the team has been mediocre at best, and have gone through some stinky seasons in the post-apocalyptic A-Rod contract debacle. This year, Michael is having another strong season as he pushes the team toward the playoffs.

If Michael leads the Ranger's to the playoffs and Tony Romo does the same for the 'Boys, then we have some serious half-Mexican representation in the DFW area. Awesome possum. Si se puede.

Funhouse: The Movie

I recently tortured my 'partner' into watching one of my favorite guilty pleasure, Tobe Hooper's Funhouse. I had to coax this person with a twelve-pack of cold, thirst quenching Schlitz, but once the film began and the beer began to frow freely, the fun and scares exploded in all directions.

The film is about a creepy carnival that comes through town and leaves mayhem in the lives of several 'teens'. Everytime I watch it, it reminds me of the WBCA carnival, or that creepy carnival that sets up over by Burlingon on Sanber. Carnies are a crazy bunch. The film itself is watchable and actually has several interesting scenes. In the words of Frank over at Cinema Gonzo, the film deals with suburbanites "forced to deal with humanity in all of it's gloriously deconstructed chaos." That is just how I feel everytime I pass by Santa Rita. Damn.

Memoirs of my Grandmother

the latest installment of our featured columnist, Maria Cisneros

Memoirs of my Grandomother

by Maria Cisneros

Often we find ourselves questioning who we are as individuals. As my father often likes to remind me, who we are as children is often the person who we truly are inside. I must say then, that I am a truly blessed and happy human being. Family is number one for me, if that point hasn’t been made already; they are the ones that have kept me sane and centered. In life, one particular person often influences us more than others. In my case, I’d have to say this person was my grandmother. She was an exceptional woman. I could write a whole book about her but I’m going to share a couple of lessons she taught me. This woman was just too awesome to keep them all to myself.

Good Eats

This eatery does not look like much from the outside, but it's actually pretty good food. Free meal to the first person that can tell me name and address of this fine local establishment.

Aldo Tatangelo Grave

Sandra Cisneros in my Bed

Sandra Cisneros in my Bed

by GB

My First grown-up crush as short but sweet

Sweet, like chocolate-frosted donuts at 6am.

I fell madly in love with Sandra Cisneros.

She was a real writer y "bien cabrona y berrinchuda".

You Bring out the Mexican in Me, I first read

in 1997 and immediately fell at her feet.

For an entire week we had a torrid love affair.

I immersed myself in all her works.

She the author, I the reader.

I would take her to bed,

when I read her books before I went to sleep.

She would make me laugh, cry and even punch the wall.

I loved to taste her prose, so sweet,

as the mango on the street on which she lived.

But then, something happend.

I fell in love with Ana Castillo.

And not being one for threesomes,

I no longer read with Sandra.

And well, I guess Sandra Cisneros got upset

 Because she didn't call me anymore.